Archive | Common Courtesy

Do You Want My Opinion or My Tacit Agreement?

Many people ask me for my opinions. My opinions are solicited by family, friends, and clients, and sometimes, even by strangers. I would go as far as saying I am a professional giver of opinions, in that my clients retain me primarily for my expert opinions and advice about their high stakes lawsuits. Sometimes, however, […]

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This topic is obviously very real and concerning to Melissa.  The nature of the two relationships with which Melissa was dealing in this situation made it even more difficult.  Fortunately, I do not think I have faced such a conflicting situation.  I may be guilty of offering unsolicited advice or suggestions, and sometimes, a best […]

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Be Nice

Be nice. That’s easy to understand, but sometimes, difficult to do. What does it mean to “be nice”? I never gave it much thought until I had lunch at a restaurant in Fort Lauderdale several years ago. The restaurant’s slogan is “be nice” and they have bumper stickers with this motto for anyone to take. […]

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The opposite of being nice, that is, being mean, seems to have a much higher degree of visibility.  Mean sells, mean makes the news.  The increased political polarization of our United States seems to increase meanness, and decrease niceties.  For some, the example of “leaders” behaving badly translates into a belief that those behaviors are […]

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The Ability to Understand Others’ Perspectives

I believe everyone is entitled to their opinion. This includes me. When conducting mock jury or other social psychological research, I almost always encourage the open expression of differing views by informing our research participants that “There are no wrong opinions or points of view.” I know some people who enjoy verbal sparring, however, I […]

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In our often politically polarized world, it appears difficult for some people to accept that other people have valid, opposing, opinions.  Our work involves watching “regular people” who are recruited to participate in our mock juries or focus groups express their opinions.  Clearly, some people are more adamant about their own opinions than others.  Some […]

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Someone else will do it – but I’m the someone else

“I’ll get around to it.” “ I was going to do that.” “Oh, you beat me to it.” I hear these comments on a frequent basis. Most people move more slowly than me, including some who go through life at a snail’s pace. When I start cleaning up their mess, picking their trash off the […]

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It becomes a personal challenge of mine to stay ahead of Melissa, where I can.  And, there are many times when she wants something done that I’ve already accomplished.  Further, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve cleaned up something that she never saw on the floor and our counters, at home or the […]

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How Did You Love?

Charlie Watkins and I have been friends since 1964, when we were in first grade together at Allen Park Elementary School in Fort Myers, Florida. There are many things I like, and love, about my friend, Charlie, including our shared fondness for beautiful flowers; our mutual love of rock and roll music, played loudly; and […]

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I think the idea conveyed by the question “How Did You Love?” is worth considering in our world which is so full of stress and strife.  Perhaps I’d modify the question a bit, and ask, “How Did You Live?”  Too many people seem to live their lives not in love, but in meanness, anger, and […]

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Better Not Look Down

I had the privilege of seeing the late, great, B. B. King perform in concert on many occasions. He was a source of inspiration to me for many reasons, including his commitment to keeping the blues alive. One of my favorite songs of his, written by Will Jennings and Joe Sample, is “Better Not Look […]

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As anyone who reads our posts knows, song lyrics are a part of our outlook on the world.  When I read Melissa’s post, and comments of those who live their lives in the past, I immediately thought of “Living in the Past” (Jethro Tull) and Bruce Springsteen’s anthem “Glory Days.”  But more so, I thought […]

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Billing Expectations

As a follow up to my post on professionalism based on my recent experience of being a lawyer’s client, I want to discuss billing expectations. As I told my family’s lawyer during an extremely unpleasant phone call, what he did to us was like taking one’s car to the repair shop, getting an estimate, then […]

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Almost everyone wants to know the price of something before they purchase it.  This is true regardless if someone is buying a hot dog, a car, or paying for legal services.  Things can look fine, but if they are too expensive, in consideration for what they offer, there will be a disconnect between the product/service […]

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Be Professional

This is a topic I’ve had on my “to be written” list for a long time. I’m prompted to write it now based on having been on the client side of working with a lawyer. Having been the client of lawyers on several occasions, I can say I much prefer the relationship in which the […]

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What does it mean to conduct oneself with professionalism?  Professionalism, in my opinion, does not equate with wearing an expensive suit, working in a high rise office building with a scenic view, or many of the other outward, but superficial indicators of success.  Recently, David and I spent a few days in Merida, Mexico.  We […]

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Help When There’s a “Cause”

Almost everyone has a “cause” or sometimes, more than one, that they support. Many people support causes by merely talking about them, while others volunteer their time and provide financial assistance to their favorite cause. For example, the Humane Society in many people’s hometown depends on monetary contributions, donations, and volunteer staff members to fulfill […]

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I’m not sure what prompted Melissa to write her post. Goodness knows, she has supported many “causes” whether friends, families, or strangers.  We both have in various ways, including working on cases pro bono when the cause was just.  What struck me though, in reading her post is how often the act of helping others […]

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Altruism & Helping Behaviors

Helping is one component of altruism. Other components are an orientation toward other people, instead of to oneself, and a generally prosocial outlook (as opposed to an antisocial outlook). Most theories of altruism include the component of enhancing other people’s welfare at some cost to oneself (in terms of time, money, etc.). Altruistic people are […]

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I was, for a couple of years, a Boy Scout, as well as a Cub Scout prior to the Boy Scouts membership.  Though I didn’t stick with Boy Scouts too long because music, band – baritone horn, took over my free time.  But, I was a scout long enough to learn about helping others.  The […]

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