Archive | Common Courtesy

Categories of Missed Opportunity

Some people have experienced significant loss, hardship, and a decline in physical and mental health during their lives. (I often think about Nelson Mandela’s 27 years of imprisonment as an example of this type of personal suffering.) Other people have had some serious setbacks, such as a bankruptcy, death of a parent, or a chronic […]

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Melissa wrote her part of this post some time ago, during the 2020 pandemic, and I’m playing catch up.  In a way, it is interesting to see how things have worked out over time, due to changes triggered by a pandemic.  Many things have changed permanently.  Work place changes are a big and obvious change.  […]

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When Asking for a Favor, Make it Easy for Me to Help

As long time readers of David’s and my blog know, I am almost constantly barraged with people’s requests for me to help them. This is, as I tell many people, the story of my life. I help people who need my help, both in my professional life as well as in my personal life. I […]

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I don’t recall the specific incident that prompted this post.  In fact, this type of situation seems so common that it is difficult to pinpoint it at all.  It is not rare, it is, unfortunately, common.  It is not that we’re picking on our clients, all of whom happen to be lawyers; no, we’re not […]

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Paid Versus Free Opinions

To follow up on my previous post about people asking for my opinions, I have noticed an interesting phenomenon. Although it is far from universal, I have observed that people, such as friends and family, who ask for my opinion with no intention of paying me for my time or expertise, often devalue or discount […]

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Melissa is in the position of giving, or rather, selling, advice on a daily basis.  In a way, that is the business we are in.  Of course, much of Melissa’s advice builds not only on her education, training, knowledge and experiences, but on data collected and analyzed for our client’s cases.  Clients pay “good money” […]

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Do You Want My Opinion or My Tacit Agreement?

Many people ask me for my opinions. My opinions are solicited by family, friends, and clients, and sometimes, even by strangers. I would go as far as saying I am a professional giver of opinions, in that my clients retain me primarily for my expert opinions and advice about their high stakes lawsuits. Sometimes, however, […]

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This topic is obviously very real and concerning to Melissa.  The nature of the two relationships with which Melissa was dealing in this situation made it even more difficult.  Fortunately, I do not think I have faced such a conflicting situation.  I may be guilty of offering unsolicited advice or suggestions, and sometimes, a best […]

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Be Nice

Be nice. That’s easy to understand, but sometimes, difficult to do. What does it mean to “be nice”? I never gave it much thought until I had lunch at a restaurant in Fort Lauderdale several years ago. The restaurant’s slogan is “be nice” and they have bumper stickers with this motto for anyone to take. […]

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The opposite of being nice, that is, being mean, seems to have a much higher degree of visibility.  Mean sells, mean makes the news.  The increased political polarization of our United States seems to increase meanness, and decrease niceties.  For some, the example of “leaders” behaving badly translates into a belief that those behaviors are […]

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The Ability to Understand Others’ Perspectives

I believe everyone is entitled to their opinion. This includes me. When conducting mock jury or other social psychological research, I almost always encourage the open expression of differing views by informing our research participants that “There are no wrong opinions or points of view.” I know some people who enjoy verbal sparring, however, I […]

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In our often politically polarized world, it appears difficult for some people to accept that other people have valid, opposing, opinions.  Our work involves watching “regular people” who are recruited to participate in our mock juries or focus groups express their opinions.  Clearly, some people are more adamant about their own opinions than others.  Some […]

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Someone else will do it – but I’m the someone else

“I’ll get around to it.” “ I was going to do that.” “Oh, you beat me to it.” I hear these comments on a frequent basis. Most people move more slowly than me, including some who go through life at a snail’s pace. When I start cleaning up their mess, picking their trash off the […]

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It becomes a personal challenge of mine to stay ahead of Melissa, where I can.  And, there are many times when she wants something done that I’ve already accomplished.  Further, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve cleaned up something that she never saw on the floor and our counters, at home or the […]

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How Did You Love?

Charlie Watkins and I have been friends since 1964, when we were in first grade together at Allen Park Elementary School in Fort Myers, Florida. There are many things I like, and love, about my friend, Charlie, including our shared fondness for beautiful flowers; our mutual love of rock and roll music, played loudly; and […]

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I think the idea conveyed by the question “How Did You Love?” is worth considering in our world which is so full of stress and strife.  Perhaps I’d modify the question a bit, and ask, “How Did You Live?”  Too many people seem to live their lives not in love, but in meanness, anger, and […]

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Better Not Look Down

I had the privilege of seeing the late, great, B. B. King perform in concert on many occasions. He was a source of inspiration to me for many reasons, including his commitment to keeping the blues alive. One of my favorite songs of his, written by Will Jennings and Joe Sample, is “Better Not Look […]

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As anyone who reads our posts knows, song lyrics are a part of our outlook on the world.  When I read Melissa’s post, and comments of those who live their lives in the past, I immediately thought of “Living in the Past” (Jethro Tull) and Bruce Springsteen’s anthem “Glory Days.”  But more so, I thought […]

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Billing Expectations

As a follow up to my post on professionalism based on my recent experience of being a lawyer’s client, I want to discuss billing expectations. As I told my family’s lawyer during an extremely unpleasant phone call, what he did to us was like taking one’s car to the repair shop, getting an estimate, then […]

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Almost everyone wants to know the price of something before they purchase it.  This is true regardless if someone is buying a hot dog, a car, or paying for legal services.  Things can look fine, but if they are too expensive, in consideration for what they offer, there will be a disconnect between the product/service […]

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