Archive | Common Courtesy

It ain’t bragging if it’s true

The late bass player extraordinaire, Jaco Pastorius, used to introduce himself as “The world’s greatest bass player.” To anyone who took offense, he replied, “It ain’t bragging if it’s true.” I am fortunate to possess high self esteem. I know what I am good at and, just as important, I am aware of areas in […]

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Okay, for starters, Melissa does make great spaghetti, but that is not the point of this post.  The point is how to get through life when one knows they are the best at, or at least really good at, something.  It seems that, in many western cultures, being proud of one’s abilities, achievements, or possessions, […]

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Lawyer Egos

When writing the post about “It ain’t bragging if it is true,” I paused for a minute thinking about how a high impression of oneself – a big ego – is necessary in some settings. Mick Jagger would not be strutting his stuff in front of thousands of people if he didn’t have the ego […]

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Although my job working for lawyers with big egos can sometimes be challenging, it also provides me with many fun experiences. When I am in the presence of attorneys who have over sized egos, I search for ways to find common ground, as a way to foster rapport with them so that they will know […]

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When not to smile

A Point of View

Melissa Pigott, Ph.D.

On February 7, 2017

Category: Business personalities, Careers, Common Courtesy, Getting the Job Done, Getting Through Life and Work

I wrote in a previous post that I often smile at strangers while I am looking them in the eye, particularly if they appear threatening. In this situation, I am using my smile as a way to deflect a negative event. In general, however, I am not a smiley person. I have often been criticized […]

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Another View

David H. Fauss, M.S.M.

On February 7, 2017

Category: Business personalities, Careers, Common Courtesy, Getting the Job Done, Getting Through Life and Work

Smiles, as simple as they are, can be inappropriate or misunderstood. Smiling, as a way to share positive vibes, is, perhaps, a one way action. It may not, as Melissa noted, be appropriate to expect a smile in return. The world can be a difficult place for many – and smiling may not be in […]

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Smile at people

A Point of View

Melissa Pigott, Ph.D.

On January 31, 2017

Category: Common Courtesy, Getting Through Life and Work, Jury Consultants, Life Outside of Work, Litigation Consultants, Trial Consulting

I took a women’s self defense class with friend of mine. I learned many valuable things that I have put into practice since then. I also learned that my education and skills as a social psychologist have been paying off as they apply to my interactions with strangers, including those who might have an intent […]

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I sometimes have to cogitate on these posts before writing, especially when responding as 2nd blogger. This topic is one of those so I read Melissa’s writing and then I have been thinking about it. Part of that thinking about it has been to pay attention to people on the street. Do they smile? Do […]

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Do you really know what I’m thinking? Do you want to know?

In this final post inspired by a dreadful meeting David and I recently attended, I will cover a dangerous game played by some people. These people, none of whom are psychologists (or our counterparts in the medical field, psychiatrists), have an inflated sense of self and often believe other people share in their belief that […]

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There are several takeaway lessons from the fateful meeting which prompted this series of posts. One is definitely “know what you don’t know.” A favorite professor of mine once told me about the difference between smart, and not so smart, people. The smart ones know they don’t know it all and try to learn what […]

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A woman can be, and is, the boss

I have written several previous posts about sexism and its prevalence in many aspects of today’s society. Although there are numerous examples of the removal of gender barriers in many segments of the business world, there remains, in my opinion, an assumption among many people that, being “the boss” means being a man (and a […]

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I have always been cognizant of the risks of assumptions – there is that adage about assuming which works pretty well. I want to know who’s who and would never want to “step in it” as the person Melissa describes. My career is fairly unique in that I have mostly had women bosses. Even now, […]

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Find out who you’re meeting with

A Point of View

Melissa Pigott, Ph.D.

On November 1, 2016

Category: Careers, Common Courtesy, Employment, Getting the Job Done, Marketing your Business, Small Business Success

I prepare for every meeting with every client and potential client by researching them via the many sources available for finding out about people. In that most of my clients are attorneys, it is relatively simple to find out about them by looking at their firm’s website, attorney ratings services, and their bar association. Prior […]

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Another View

David H. Fauss, M.S.M.

On November 1, 2016

Category: Careers, Common Courtesy, Employment, Getting the Job Done, Marketing your Business, Small Business Success

Once again a post was inspired by 1 particular, and unusual, meeting. But, to Melissa and me, it had many problems which are now turned into opportunities to discuss and thus is born another post. Melissa covers the reasons to do one’s homework prior to a meeting. We like to know something about those with […]

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The Sound of Silence

“The Sound of Silence” (originally titled, “The Sounds of Silence”) was written by Paul Simon, recorded by Simon and Garfunkel in 1965, and covered in 2015 by the band Disturbed. The premise of the song, according to Art Garfunkel, is the inability of people to communicate with each other in a meaningful way, resulting in, […]

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The meeting that inspired this series of posts was not quiet; there was little silence.  But, there may as well have been silence because the words being spoken were drifting into the ether with the hot air being expelled as they were spoken.  It was a surprising disconnect.  I know there were some explanations for […]

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The more you talk, the more you’ll convince me you have nothing to say

The more some people talk, the less they have to say about anything important. And, the more some people talk, the more I am convinced they have nothing to say. We have all met people who chatter on and on, saying many words about nothing in particular. Some people have “the gift of gab” and […]

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The last sentence of Melissa’s post is a variation of one of those things that everyone’s mother says to their children, or used to do so, “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”  But that virtue has gone by the wayside in a world where the presidential candidates fight it out […]

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Sales 101 – Learn Names

Many principles of sales and marketing have origins in social psychology. One of the most basic principles involved in being a good salesperson is learning the name of a potential customer, then saying the person’s name during conversations, as a way of building rapport. For example, every competent car salesperson asks the name of everyone […]

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Another of our posts has been about mind games and I would have to say that the story that concluded Melissa’s post about knowing names involved a bit of a mind game on her part. I saw it coming – the person we were meeting with did not. There were several ways he could have […]

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